Red Pill, Blue Pill

Red Pill, Blue Pill

If you could get all the nutrition you needed in a day with a pill — no worrying about what to eat, no food preparation — would you do it?

And give up German hot-dogs, Bratwurst, Düsseldorf burgers, pizza with double cheese and meatballs, Chinese food and my special match-day sandwich? I don’t think so. And yet it’s precisely because of all of those things that my answer should be yes. Being able to obtain sufficient nutrition from a pill would cut out any worries about eating too much junk food. It would solve a few other problems too. It would create more free time which would mean more time to watch football or make videos. It would solve the annoying problem of the mad dash at half time when you run out of snacks.

On a more practical level it would solve a very big real life problem, never needing to cook would mean it would be one thing I could cross off the list of things that make living alone difficult. It’s not the cooking part I have so much trouble with, I can cook just fine, it’s the paying attention part that’s the problem. The remembering what you’re doing and focusing on that and that alone, not wandering off because you’ve got a new story idea or because you’ve remembered something you want to look up online. Or the most likely scenario, putting something in the oven and then reading a book whilst waiting, and of course forgetting about it. Ever wonder what pizza and plastic tastes like, well I know the answer to that question. And for once Jogi or Hansi were not to blame. In fact not even Manuel or Roman were to blame. The answer is a little more geeky and for that reason I’ll refrain from explaining further.

So I guess I would do such a thing, or at least I would if I could, because here’s the kicker, I can’t swallow pills unless they are hidden in a sandwich or some type of food. Ironic, right? As Sheldon says I’m stuck between a rock and a crazy place.

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